Submitted by: dunno source via Submit Page
Um, can I come? ‘Cause I have a feeling this wedding is going to be good. I can bring chocolate rosaries or something. I would enjoy nothing more than to witness Shelley and Laura destroy the sanctity of marriage and all that is holy. Sounds way better than calling my mother to get a daily dose of guilt.
Related: More Sheer Awesomeness
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*giggle* *GIGGLE* BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
This is most excellent. I’m a Christian in the South, and I’m supposed to get all uppity and offended at this, but I just can’t. It’s too awesome. Any marriage that starts out with that great a sense of humor has a great shot at going long and wonderful.
*waits for my Fundamentalist Baptist friends to come banging on my door with pitchforks and torches*
A great shot at committing a sin. There I fixed it for you Christian Troll.
First I was offended all on my own, and then I saw your post and was EXTRA offended. Please don’t proclaim to follow Christ if you actually DON’T…there are enough confused people already in this world (like the couple on the invite, for instance)
1 Corinthians 13:13.
Leviticus 19:18.
Galatians 5:14.
James 2:8.
Mark 12:31.
Get to reading, you two, and explain exactly how love is a sin. Last I checked, most of those quotes are from the lips of your Savior.
Leviticus 18:22: “Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable”… also 1 Cor. 6:9.
And btw, all the verses you quoted about love being an important commandment are absolutely true- that is why you love the sinner, hate the sin. (in other words, be don’t be rude to people because they are gay, but that doesn’t mean you pat them on the back and say, “good for you! way to sin!”) Point them towards the truth with love…
and my original comment anyway was directed toward someone who *claims* to be Christian, but certainly doesn’t sound like it
There are quite a few different kinds of Christians in the world too, you know. not all take the bible literally; It is a guide for life, but clearly some of it is outdated or poorly translated.
…and none of them can even agree to believe on the same “god”. hehe Don’t worry, I hate you all. So, it’s not discrimination.
And, why yes, I would LOVE to go to hell. I prefer torture everyday than the boredom heaven will inflict. 
Thanks for inviting me!
“It’s always Leviticus. ‘Thou shalt not lie with man as with woman.’ Well, I DON’T.” – Maggie Cassella
First, while I agree, I would just like to point out that, based on the names on the invite, it does not seem like Leviticus 18:22 would apply here.
On to the agreement: if you are gonna lie with a man, do it right. No foreplay. No cuddling. Just wam-bam, thank you sir. Then everyone falls asleep. Anything else is detestable.
Well…. you don’t sound like so much fun :/ i truly pity your life partner… actually, those sound like the words of someone who was asked “is it in yet?” just too many times.
Humor detection fail.
What else from the old testament should we take literally? Stoning to death our disobedient children? Selling our daughters into slavery? Paying a man a paltry sum for causing our wife’s miscarriage? Giving 90% of our income and goods to the church (read the Bible–that’s what it says: 90%, not 10%)? I don’t get why people are quick to defend taking Leviticus 18:22 literally, but not the rest of the Law.
Amen to that.
can you quote these verses? please back up claims with textual evidence, in context.
Deuteronomy 22:13-21 (King James Version)
13If any man take a wife, and go in unto her, and hate her,
14And give occasions of speech against her, and bring up an evil name upon her, and say, I took this woman, and when I came to her, I found her not a maid:
15Then shall the father of the damsel, and her mother, take and bring forth the tokens of the damsel’s virginity unto the elders of the city in the gate:
16And the damsel’s father shall say unto the elders, I gave my daughter unto this man to wife, and he hateth her;
17And, lo, he hath given occasions of speech against her, saying, I found not thy daughter a maid; and yet these are the tokens of my daughter’s virginity. And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city.
18And the elders of that city shall take that man and chastise him;
19And they shall amerce him in an hundred shekels of silver, and give them unto the father of the damsel, because he hath brought up an evil name upon a virgin of Israel: and she shall be his wife; he may not put her away all his days.
20But if this thing be true, and the tokens of virginity be not found for the damsel:
21Then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die: because she hath wrought folly in Israel, to play the whore in her father’s house: so shalt thou put evil away from among you.
Text quoted. So I ask you: Were you able to TRULY wear white on that fateful day?
If you want to take certain quotes as law you gotta take ‘em all.
I don’t know where mrsthing got the 90% thing–there’s not even –but her point is made even by the incontrovertible Biblical commands to give away 10% (Deut. 26:12-14).
One is commanded to have one’s disobedient sons stoned at Deut 21:18-24:
18 If someone has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father and mother, who does not heed them when they discipline him, 19then his father and his mother shall take hold of him and bring him out to the elders of his town at the gate of that place. 20They shall say to the elders of his town, ‘This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us. He is a glutton and a drunkard.’ 21Then all the men of the town shall stone him to death. So you shall purge the evil from your midst; and all Israel will hear, and be afraid.
A quick search didn’t turn up a *commandment* to sell a daughter into slavery, just permission: Ex. 21:7, “When a man sells his daughter as a slave, she shall not go out as the male slaves do.” Various specific rules about how one is to treat a female slave follow. Very enlightened teaching for our time. /sarcasm
The “paltry sum for causing a miscarriage” refers to Exodus 21:22. The meaning of the verse is contested–does it refer to causing a miscarriage or simply to causing the woman to go into labor early, but with no serious harm to the child or woman? Either way, the essential treatment of women and children as property is the same: when harm is done to a woman, a fine is paid to her husband. Not to her. Married women couldn’t own property–which, by the way, tells you something about the true meaning of this “traditional marriage” whose perfection people love to sing.
And then, of course, there are all the rules about not eating fish unless they have both fins and scales, not eating meat and milk together, not eating mammals unless they have both split hooves and a cud, not mixing linen and wool in your clothing, etc. (k1tt3h, you’ve read the whole Bible so you can find the citations yourself, right?), none of which any Christians I know insist upon today. When asked why, they say either “Jesus cancelled those commandments” or “duh, we’re not Jewish, we’re Christian.” Well, okay. So why does any Christian insist that Lev. 18:22 is so all-fired important, not only for Christians but for EVERYONE?
It’s pretty obvious. These so-called Christians enforce the laws that fit their own prejudices, hunting through the Bible if necessary to find verses to back them up and blithely skipping over the pieces of God’s word (their term, not mine) that don’t suit them. Jesus said nothing about homosexuals, but he had more than a few choice words to say about hypocrites. So may I suggest to you, k1tt3h, that you open up your Bible and pray hard and long on Matthew 7:3-5?
Amen!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can’t verify any of the above claims conclusively, so point to you. However, I could find this in Leviticus:
Aaron’s sons Nadab and Abihu took their censers, put fire in them and added incense; and they offered unauthorized fire before the LORD, contrary to his command. 2 So fire came out from the presence of the LORD and consumed them, and they died before the LORD. 3 Moses then said to Aaron, “This is what the LORD spoke of when he said:
” ‘Among those who approach me
I will show myself holy;
in the sight of all the people
I will be honored.’ ”
Aaron remained silent.
What apparently happens here is that the LORD kills two guys for offering him the wrong kind of fire.
That’s not really relevant, I just thought it was kind of odd.
Nevermind about not being able to verify, I didn’t look as hard as other people apparently.
Nah, just some of us learned this stuff in seminary.
–Another heretic
Amen, mrsthing!! Personally, being a lesbian and getting ready to take a wife, I would be PROUD to have you at my wedding!
OK, maybe you are unclear on the biology, but it is physically impossible for a man to “lie with a man as one lies with a woman.” They are missing a critical part of the anatomy for that.
ah, word parsing….often times in conventional English, “man” is a ubiquitous term that can apply to either man or woman. For example, if we say “the history of man,” we mean “mankind,” which means “humankind,” which includes both men and women. The obvious meaning of not lying with a man as one lies with a woman, while directed toward a male audience (because the author just went ahead and assumed that most people with their heads screwed on straight would choose the right sex to sleep with…go figure…) is an exhortation not to lie with the SAME sex. I really hope that you *got* this simple translation on your own, but were choosing to ignore it for the sake of trying to trip me up. Which failed.
the author just went ahead and assumed that most people with their heads screwed on straight would choose the right sex to sleep with
Which author was that? I thought the Bible was the word of God, who surely would not make the mistake of making incorrect assumptions about his readership (surely He knew we’d be reading it in the 21st-century United States, not just in BCE Canaan, and was capable of making His point clear to all His children).
If it was written by some other author who lacked this omniscience, could you explain again why exactly we are supposed to obey every line?
I know I’m not going to get anywhere with you, k1tt3h, but I hope anyone else reading this learns two things: that the people who proof-text from the Bible about homosexuality are not even doing good Biblical scholarship, and that the Bible is a human document that reflects the prejudices of its scores of authors. Caveat lector. If there’s a God who created us, that God gave us brains. Maybe we should use them.
Thank you Amy, your comment nails it to a T.
I can’t wait for the day that people will stop (like sheep or robots) following everything literally and start thinking for themselves…
And to the others, let people love who ever they want, it’s none of your business anyways, it doesn’t take anything away from you, does not affect your life. Unless someone in your circle happens to have a different sexuality than yours. In that case, consider yourself lucky to have someone fabulous around you!
k1tt3h: So, man=mankind=humankind=woman, so marrying a man is fundamentally the same as marrying a man. What exactly is the problem here??!!
Scr*w this, I’m going home to my wife.. err, husband.. whatever.
I bet you’re one of the thousands of people who throw that verse around even though you’ve never read the whole thing. Are you aware that that SAME passage says it is ALSO an abomination to place two types of cattle in the same pasture? Lest you be seen as a bigot, I suggest you head straight to your nearest local farmer and “point them towards the truth”..
actually, I’ve read the entire Bible, thanks. I’m going to go ahead and assume you haven’t.
Actually, k1tt3h, there is an old saying about assuming things that you just might want to look up.
Neither of those nice ladies are lying with men so I guess their fine!
I love bigoted people. It just shows how the world can evolve and change, but the Christians don’t.
Have hope–Christians have changed HUGELY and especially on this issue.
I’m a christian and i am absolutely fine with gay marriage, you shouldn’t assume that all christians are like k1tt3h
The thing is, christians do evolve and change, they just lie about it. A couple centuries ago christian preachers defended slavery and said that god made black people to be used as slave labor, but now they ignore that history and play up christian abolitionists who were denounced as heathens in their day. A few decades ago interracial marriage was illegal, declared an abomination to god, but hardly anyone will dare throw around that “god made the races separate” BS anymore. Within a century, same-sex marriage will be legal in every civilized country, and within two at most christians will be trying to claim that they always supported it, preaching about love and tolerance while trying to deny equal rights to some other group. They’re being slowly dragged into the future kicking and screaming.
Amen
Anyway, religion is invented… So, sin is too! Have a good night.
HOLY FUCK, Bible Battle!
Haha. You’re all just hilarious.
No, most of those verses are the words of Paul, not Jesus. The Mark reference probably is Jesus. Jesus never addressed homosexuality–that was Moses and Paul.
And I think the invitation ROCKS!
*OUR* savior. Jesus died for the sins of me, you, Laura, Shelley…….
/Your/ savior. Not everyone’s. Arrogant presumption. Nearly 7 Billion people alive today, roughly 2 billion count themselves ‘christian’. That leaves the VAST majority wrong? Perhaps yours is the wrong religion? Ever think about that? Nope, cuz YOURS is the only correct view I’m sure. Christianity in it’s current form has only been around for roughly 1,700 years (wasn’t that big until Constantine made it official in the 4th century – before that it was a Jewish faction). Homosexuality is as natural as sunshine. If you don’t like it, don’t do it, but f*ck, quit telling other people they’re wrong!
Dak, I glad you said the brought up that whole natural thing. That’s like the NUMBER ONE argument that the church and the unfortunately very large number of bigoted Christians *cough*k1tt3h*cough* put into action against homosexuality. That it isn’t natural. Because apparently, “You don’t see cute little bunnies or ponies laying with another of the *gasp* same sex, do you? No, because they behave the way God created them to.” Pfft, you don’t see them, but scientists have actually PROVEN that in basically every species, homosexuality appears in about the same ratio as it does in humans. And all who are not in this “Bible Battle” Boat, please don’t think that all Christians are like this. A small but growing number of Christians (most under 35) are beginning to accept homosexuality. Heck, I AM Christian. I’m also a lesbian. Suck it.
Kayt – you rawk! When the majority of Christians are as (apparently) well adjusted and enlightened as you, maybe we’ll see a little less bigotry around.
Then I will sin in his honor by making a woman MUCH happier than a man could ever accomplish!
But, in all seriousness, you need to get laid. hehe
Oh my god, SHUT UP! Get off your pedestal. I hope there is a hell of some sort and you get chucked in it for being an absolutely idiotic twat!
Go watch some evangelist and don’t bother me again.
Not confused. In love and happy.
k1tt3h – you think they’re confused? Your bigoted, intolerant ignorance is adorable. I’m not sure why you think you’re going to heaven when you harbor hatred like that.
riiight…because the part where I specifically said “hate the SIN, love the sinnER” was either totally ignored by you and piecemeal appropriated for your own purposes, like liberals love to do…… OR you just don’t comprehend that it means hating an intangible idea yet loving a person with brotherly love….so I’m not sure where the “bigotry” part comes in
Then let me explain. The bigotry part comes in when you try to pass laws that violate equal protection under the law, based on your interpretation of your religion.
If you think I am misguided and wrong in my religious beliefs, fine, preach how wrong I am in your church. (I’ll go to my own, thanks.) But don’t try to make your perceived inferiority of same-sex relationships the law of my country. That is called bigotry.
Actually, the bigotry part comes in where you believe that someone loving someone else, no matter their gender, is a sin. Believing that love, of any description is a sin is bigotry. Because what you are saying is that THAT love is invalid in god’s eyes. Who are you to judge which love is valid and which isn’t? Don’t you know that playing god is the worst sin of all?…for some reason. /simpsons quote/
The bible is an historical document, a book of fables and often a life guide. I can’t help but think anyone who actually takes it literally is mentally handicapped and shouldn’t breed.
You go, girls!
and BTW, I’ll repeat once again, that my original comment was meant for the poster who claimed to be Christian but didn’t sound like it. I’m not surprised at all to be the minority of opinion here. The Bible also makes it clear that this world is the domain of satan, not God…its been a fallen world since Eden. The Bible tells Christians not to judge nonbelievers, that’s God’s job. BUt believers ARE supposed to help keep other believers on-track…kind of like if I was Jewish and saw another Jewish person who claimed to keep kosher eating some bacon…I should then call them out on being hypocritical. Goodness knows, enough people already have an unfortunate conception of Christians being hypocritical (and some, unfortunately, are). SO AGAIN, my original post was directed at the one who claimed to be Christian.
I see you haven’t yet responded to the person that gave you examples of all of the instances in the bible that were brought up before. You seem to pick and choose whom you respond to and then once you’re proven wrong and your false views on the bible let you down, you move on to the next person. I am a Christian and I love all people, and want them all to live happily. And love freely. If you were a true Christian you would feel the same way. I hope you change your ways before you burn in hell for your bigotry, as you make the lives of those around you whom are just trying to be happy a hell on Earth. Don’t bother responding with your lies and excuses either.
I’m atheist.
I define myself as queer because I don’t believe in sexual orientation.
Ignorance is humanity’s number one enemy.
You seem young and naïve k1tt3h, go out there and meet people who might be different from you and you’ll a thing or two that your religion doesn’t teach you. A recent study (I forget the author) of 400 species has found even animals practice not only homosexuality, but also SM, which was a big surprise. Sexuality is probably the most complex part of a human being. Don’t think you understand it all by following a religion. Just accept differences and learn from them.
And quote to me exactly what Jesus said about gay marriage?
*resounding silence*
………..tumbleweed…………….
More like what Jesus doesn’t say. Matthew 8:5-13 and Luke 7:1-10 describe the story of a Roman centurion, distraught over the illness of his servant, asks Jesus to heal the young man. Jesus is moved by the centurion’s devotion and offers to go to the boy right away, but the soldier says something like, “No, you don’t have to come to my house. You’re a leader, like me. Just say the word, and he will be healed.” Jesus praises the man’s faith, and the boy is indeed healed from that moment. Even as a little girl, I wondered why the centurion was so choked up and worried over his servant (or slave, some accounts read). Turns out there’s another translation for that word…
Enough criticism! God put k1tt3h in charge of defining what a Christian is, and who is or isn’t doing it right. Only SHE knows which sections are to be taken literally, and which are just too darn inconvenient.
Poor, poor christians. So confused, so deluded. So terrified of being tortured by their imaginary friend that they’ve thrown away any capacity to relate to other human beings. So obsessed with a poorly-translated book of myths that they can no longer think for themselves. So full of hatred for anyone not in their cult that they’ve lost the ability to love. I pity them. Their lives are so empty.
And if you find my comment offensive, take a good hard look at what the christians here have been posting. I once heard of this guy who said to do unto others as you’d have them do unto you, but I’m sure he was just some damn godless sodomite who no true christian would bother listening to.
You know how god made the whole world in seven days and evelution is a sham?:D
Then doesn’t that mean god invented gay people too?
please reply, Your views are fascinating
i totally sympathize with you. as a roman catholic i suppose i SHOULD be offended but the thing is, i’m not. go Shelley and Laura!!! prove the naysayers wrong with a 25 year anniversary!!!
You’re awesome, pepsibookcat!
Oh damn. Me and my wife should have totally worded our invites like this…
I know. I just ordered mine the other day and I’m kicking myself.
But then again, at this point, there’s still a 2% chance my parents will come. If we’d worded it like this, it’d be 0%.
“there’s still a 2% chance my parents will come. If we’d worded it like this, it’d be 0%.”
Epic.
best invite evar!
they’re getting married on my birthday…lol
ZOMG my birthday too!
A perfect day to destroy the sanctity of marriage lol.
Oh, Shelley and Laura, it’ll take you years to catch up with Britney Spears and half of the country’s politicians when it comes to destroying the sanctity of marriage. But I applaud you for trying!
And don’t forget Liz Taylor.
Donald Trump, Larry King, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Tiger Woods…
Rush Limbaugh, Ronald Reagan, Don Imus, Glenn Beck, Newt Gingrich, Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, Mark Foley, Ted Haggard, Larry Craig, Bob Allen
{http://www.dkosopedia.com/wiki/Republican_Sex_Scandals}
{http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_oet&address=358×814}
Ooo Democratic Underground, I bet that was a valid and factual source of information. Straight people have been ruining the sanctity of marriage for years, true, but not just republicans. Get a grip.
So, Katy, I guess you didn’t notice the fact that republicans are the ones claiming that allowing gay people to marry would destroy the sanctity of marriage, all while cheating on their wives, sexually harassing their staff, and frequenting prostitutes?
Liz didn’t destroy the sanctity of marriage! On the contrary, she rooted for it over and over and over…
Excellent!
I think Liza Minelli and Henry VIII got to that whole “destroying the sanctity” thing down looooooong before Britney Spears.
Meh. Smug social commentary has its place, but on a wedding invitation? Kind of adolescent.
Don’t worry. They’re not *really* getting married. You can only do that if there’s one man and one woman.
Wow, it must absolutely *kill* you inside to know that the gays can get married on equal footing. I love it!
Call me optimistic but I was under the impression that anonymouse was making a joke based on the stupid separation of “Real Marriage” and Civil Unions under Washington state law…
Don’t worry. There isn’t *really* some floating man in the sky telling everybody what to do.
Xaqtly: Best response to a dumbass. Ever.
Dance, puppets! Dance!
LAWL!
That was the BEST comment I have read thus far.
God is just a viewer of the comedy of life.. Life is a romantic comedy/tragedy!
/action movie
…but NOT a vampire movie…
Could be vampire movies. He’s totally down with that. I refer you to holy communion – ‘Drink this wine, for it is…..’ there ya go!
You’re not the boss of me! Besides, by commenting here you have proven your existence, thus negating the necessity for belief. Christianity will now crumble. Good going God!
No. It’s FUNNY. Have a sense of humor, will you?
You know, I hated people who said that “have a sense of humor” shit, but now… I think I get their intentions.
On the contrary, a wedding should express who a couple really is. People get too uptight when it comes to “weddings”, but I think you lose yourself by conforming to someone else’s tradition. Be yourself: and this is a great example of a couple being true to themselves.
pepsibookcat is right. This has all the earmarks of a long-lasting marriage. Congratulations, y’all!
That is absolutely brilliant! I love it. I think I want to meet these people, since they are obviously full of WIN. =D
If they came to Iowa for their wedding, they could even make it legal!
Iowa now has legal same-sex marriages?!
Yes, they do.
Where the heck have you been? It’s been legal since April 3, 2009.
That’s *my* lesbian wedding date too!!!!!
But it wouldn’t be legal when they went back to Washington. They’d only be married in Iowa. And they’d probably have to re-marry if they moved to Massachusetts. That’s what’s wrong with state laws for federal issues.
WIN!!!
For all you who think Jesus supports Gay Marriage. Mark 10: 5-9
5″It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied. 6″But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’[a] 7′For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,[b] 8and the two will become one flesh.’[c] So they are no longer two, but one. 9Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
It’s the law of the universe get used to it. It should be titled Marriage FAIL.
Awfully nice to get to feel superior to somebody because of the way you were born and a set of beliefs that not everyone subscribes to, isn’t it?
it’s the law of christianity. not the universe.
religious bigot fail.
Excellent!! Thank you so much for correcting that statement.
“it’s the law of christianity. not the universe.” umm you just contradicted yourself… understanding of the universe fail
Errr… let’s think about this… universe, approximately 13.75 billion years old. Length of time universe has had its rules, approximately 13.75 billion years. Christianity, approximately 2000 years old. Length of time Christianity’s rules have been around? Well, slightly longer than Christianity, since they were Judaism’s rules first, but never the less, a considerably shorter time than those of the universe.
Places where rules of the universe disagree with rules of Christianity… well, all over the place, apparently. Let’s talk about evolution, the age of the planet Earth, whether the sun rotates around the Earth or vice versa, the location of “heaven” and “hell”, the measurement of pi… just to name a few…
Places where Christianity’s rules are right and the universe’s are wrong. None. Oops.
? how is christianity the universe? Lets go back to the FACT that there are quite a few religons older than christianity.
If I don’t believe in Jesus, then why should I care if he supports my marriage?
lots of people don’t believe in Jesus, But that doesn’t change the fact that he believes in you.
So what? I tell you that just as much as Jesus believes in me, the Flying Spaghetti Monster believes in you.
Has this managed to change your life for the better?
I don’t know about k1tt3h, but MY personal relationship with the FSM has changed my life for the better. I have much more humor in my life and much less tolerance for creationist hooey. Ra-men!
If you’re religious then shouldn’t you be accepting of everybody? Jesus loved EVERYONE- regardless of their sexuality. It’s 2010, seriously- I can’t believe that people are still so close minded. Grow up, your ignorance is showing.
Before you get all huffy at me, just think about how angry it makes you when people discriminate against you and your religion. How is that any different than you discriminating against homosexuals?
I’m not bashing your religion, I just find your points narrow-minded and I thought that religion was suppose to teach acceptance? I just I missed church the day they told us to be shallow and not accept others who may be different.
Jesus said this: “For there are eunuchs who were born so from their mother’s womb; and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men; and there are eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. To him who can comprehend, that is enough.” (Matthew 19:12) so, how do you explain those “Eunuchs by birth”?
A eunuch is a man who for whatever reason can’t have sex. He’s not homosexual, he’s asexual. But I agree that gays are born, not made. This whole idea that people question their sexuality seems ludicrous to me. I never did. I’ve always known I was hetero.
“This whole idea that people question their sexuality seems ludicrous to me.”
Mmm, the thing is- society. It teaches you, basically since birth, that girls and boys have crushes on each other. Not boys on boys or girls on girls, that’s just the /friendship/ talking. Some gays don’t even KNOW they’re gay until their twenties or later! This typically happens with lesbians more than gay men since, socially girls get a lot closer to each other (both physically and emotionally) the guys do. I don’t wanna be a douche. I’m just pointing that out.
…That passage is about divorce (something Christian families often carry out. Just saying), not gay marriage. Try reading your own Bible for a change.
I agree with FlonkertonChamp; “religious bigot fail.”
But… John was “the disciple whom Jesus loved” – and, apparently, kissed frequently. …I know. Just “Bromance”. Right?
Nowhere in the Bible does it say Jesus kissed John.
Actually, during Jesus’s time, hugging and kisses on the cheek were considered casual greetings as opposed to the inmate gesture they are today. Still, even in parts of Europe such as italy, it’s quite common to be greeted with a kiss on the cheek.
“Inmate” gesture…? Oh my, that gives a whole new perspective on your sentence….
zing
stop cherry picking verses to support your fear and ignorance and come back when you follow ALL the scripture. judge not, lest ye be judged.
gotta love matthew 7
i think i love you flonkertonchamp.
speaking as a woman who is a christian and decidedly undecided about her sexuality i console myself with the fact “God is love”. he’s more forgiving than a lot of christians appear to be anyway.
personally growing up in the church i believe jesus was about love and acceptance, something lots of the bible and christians themselves kinda miss.
I LOVE this invitation. hope they have a joyous life together, looks like they have a good shot!
Aw, a little hater who calls himself a Christian. There isn’t even anything in that paragraph that says it’s the only way to do things. Logic fail AND Jesus fail!
Uh-huh.. sure. And what are you? Civil Rights FAIL? Humanity FAIL? Christian FAIL? Or should we just call you Brain Damaged, BD for short?
Well, obviously you have to be a bigoted fundamental Christian to even quote this from only one of many books of spirituality. You’re the barrow minded FAIL. By the way, Liz and I have been married ten blissful years and are in the wedding.
Congratulations, henae!
And yes, I agree with what you said.
It’s also awfully nice of you to assume that everyone believes the same things you do, and that even with basically no proof that your beliefs are much better than anyone else’s act like marriage is a heterosexual privilege, not a human right.
Hey, I can randomly quote the Bible too!
1 John 4:7-8 “Beloved, let us love one another. For love is of GOD and he who loves is borne of GOD and knows GOD. He who does not love does not know GOD for GOD is love.”
Why do you care so much what goes on in other people’s bedrooms, anyway?
Um. Mark 10 is about divorce, not same sex marraige. Fail. Move along!
Actually, according to you, it may be a marriage fail…but I doff my cap off to them(yes I am a girl).
It takes a lot of guts to say”I want to be with this person until death seperates us.”
it does not take alot of guts, on the other hand, to play internet tough guy and troll.
IOW, you can believe whatever you want, but I still think it’s daft.
“God created us all, Shelly. He doesn’t make mistakes. ” ♥
God created us all, and He loves us all. And law of the universe? When hundreds of animal species also have gay relationships? “Hate is easy, love takes courage. “
I see nothing in there that suggests the necessary gender of the wife, or anything in there that says what a woman shall do. Nor do I see anything that explicitly states that a man cannot be united to another man, or a woman to another woman. Just throwin’ that out there.
Since we’re sharing favorite Bible passages, I just LOVE the one where Jesus cures the Roman’s servant and calls the Roman a great man–it’s especially great in the Greek from which the English Bible was derived, where the word used for “servant” means “male sexual servant”. Good book indeed.
And Jesus said nothing about their relationship. Just praised the Roman’s faith.
Yeah, because the “law of the universe” is based on the barbaric tribal writings of nomadic, bronze-age desert sheep herders. Some moraility. Grow up.
But wait! If they become “one flesh” what are they? Male? Female? Transgender? Do they like pink? Are they cut? Uncut?
What does it matter if jesus doesn’t support gay marriage? Christianity is hardly the only game in town. It’s only the self-righteous that think so.
Don’t you love how well some of the comments illustrate what Shelley and Laura were talking about?
i wish we could just enjoy the humour in this post without bringing religion into the discussion. youre allowed to have your opinions and beliefs but please keep them to yourself. no one wants to hear it. believe me, everyone – no matter how they feel about this debate knows how you feel – those strongly opposed to it for religious beliefs have been very loud and verbal about it.
that being said, congrats Shelley and Laura! i think its wonderful that you two have found each other and have such a hilarious approach to your marriage. its fabulous and shares a lot about your character. i wish you nothing but the best! (and thats coming from a pentecostal
)
Hear, hear!
I saw a great write up after a wedding in the local paper… included the “bubbles that gently cascaded on the euphoric pair…” Flowery, sticky, gooey detail… gleefully nausiating!
This is very cool! I wonder how many people just glanced over the invitation and didn’t notice the wording.
I hardly ever read the comments… but just had to read this set. I KNEW the Christian right was going to be outraged. Jesse James and Tiger Woods both destroyed the sanctity of marriage. Just what is *sanctity of marriage* anyway?!
And we thought they were only doing this for the tax credit.
There’s a tax *credit* now??? It was a penalty back in ’95 when I got married. (As I found out on my tax return that year, much to my horror.)
Thank you Fluffy. You just made my day
Well done ladies!
laura & shelley … this is awesome!
“reception to follow” LOL!
Rock on, ladies, rock on! ^-^b
Ugh…how can they be so lighthearted about something as sacred as marriage? Besides it’s not real marriage anyway, if it’s between two women.
Get out of here troll. Funny thing is I do not believe in god and I have higher morals and a better sense of right and wrong than pretty much every christian I have ever encountered (and I mean personally) Ones like pepsibookcat are the good kind that we need more of and ones like rab3 and RSS need to get nailed if they are so high and mighty acting.
Let me guess – you also think it’s ‘not a real marriage’ if religion isn’t involved in it as well?
Look, two people who love each other are celebrating making a lifelong commitment. There isn’t enough love in this world so occassions like this should be celebrated!
Heck, most of my wedding day was spent laughing, it was a joyful occassion! Made more amusing by the fact that we got married outdoors (husband is athiest but is cool with me being wiccan) and traditional English weather occured and it p*ssed it down!
That, to me, was funny, especially when the druid doing our ceremony invoked the element of ‘water’ with five tons of it dripping down his neck :p
Anyhow, I’ve got to go buy a present for my cousin’s wedding where he is marrying his long-term partner. Yes they are both men, don’t go having a heart attack over it!
Hurray for Wiccans marrying Atheists!
- A fellow Pagan engaged to a spiritual Atheist
In any event, yeah, I have to go buy a present too for my best friend, he’s getting married to this awesome guy and they are so cute together!!!
And I would have accepted it even before I converted from Christianity, because unlike k1tt3h’s “Love the sin, hate the sinner” comment, I don’t like to hate anything, period. Waste of energy.
Same here! Happily married Wiccan and atheist. We’ve been together 6 years, and still going strong. Only time Jesus pops up in our lives is when I hit my finger with a hammer and need to say something in a loud voice!
Ugh…how can you be so close minded? Besides, you’re not a real person anyway, if you haven’t woken up and realized that it’s 2010 and should be accepting.
Oh, “they” were very accepting of homosexuality way back at the decline of the Roman empire, too. Those who do not know history are bound to repeat it.
The Roman Empire fell because of it’s own sloth in terms of size, communication, infrastructure and political decay. Homosexuality has nothing to do with it as every society in CREATION has homosexuality, without exception. Lord knows, with all those priests nailing altar boys behind the pulpit, what does that say about the state of Catholicism, which is allegedly the first Christian faith, given your statement? Historical Fail.
A+ comment would read again.
Read your history. Homosexuality was NOT accepted during the fall of the Roman empire. It is split into two major blocks of time, the first half being when homosexuality was accepted.
During the fall it became a bad thing.
suck my strap on, closed minded bigot.
and if marriage is so sacred, then why don’t Christians flip out on divorces.
i don’t see people protesting on Tiger Woods Cheating or John divorcing his wife.
Practice what you preach. and don’t drink the kool-aid.
I love you and would happily perform that fellatio request.
Hullo there troll.
And you still wanna be a real boy don’t you? Poor Pinocchio. It’s called real love, sweets.
How “sacred ” something is depends on those viewing it. If the couple and guests view it as sacred then it is because they’re entwining their lives as one. Marriage is a word that just happens to be placed on an amazing union between two souls.
I don’t even know these two, but I would go to their wedding and give them both a big box of bonbons. Maybe stay for the reception, get a lil’ drunk, and make it a party.
I think this is utterly brilliant. These woman rock!
I agree! I want to go and watch them ruin the sanctity of marriage- I think it’d be one hell of a wedding.
[...] Sheer Awesomeness: Best Invite Phrasing Ever Submitted by: dunno source via Submit Page Um, can I come? ‘Cause I have a feeling this wedding is going to be [...] [...]
Laura and Shelley here. Thanks for your great comments. We plan on printing out this page of webinator for a poster for the actual wedding! and yes, it is going to be a GREAT time.
And dont worry about us being a same-sex couple and Jesus getting mad at us… after all, we had shrimp for lunch today while wearing a poly cotton blend shirt after having gotten our hair cut. And according to the bible, that is a triple abomination, so no doubt Jesus will not even notice us getting married.
Thanks, everyone else.
You guys rock
Congratulations!
I wish you two the best.
I adore your invite, the two of you rock! I wish you all the joy and love in your marriage that’s possible.
I love you guys so hard. May your marriage be filled with love, laughter, and light. Can’t wait to see the 50th anniversary party invitations!
Brava! And Mazel Tov!
Enjoy your day! Enjoy each other! Enjoy the love and support of your friends and family who will be joining you on this day. And enjoy the support of all of us out here, the anonymous masses, who are supporting you as well!
Awesome. All of it is awesome.
I’m a few hours south near Portland. I seriously want to crash your wedding just because you’re invite is so awesome.
Many congratulations, Laura and Shelley – I just find it a wonder when anyone has the courage to commit to someone else for life. May you have an AMAZING autumn day for it, and may each year bring you more joy, adventure and find you more in love than the last. And keep being fabulous iconoclasts who destroy the sanctity of marriage.
As a Catholic, allow me to say that 2 October is the feast of the guardian angels. May you always feel loved and protected.
Iz xx
Fabulous!!! Have a wonderful wedding day, filled with joy, and a long and happy life together. Sounds like the two of you have it figured out, and will be able to face the ups and downs with courage and smiles together! Good for you!
Best. Invite. Ever. Ladies!
When my husband and I got married, it was a really big deal to me that the minister be okay with using gender-neutral language in our ceremony. I ended up finding someone who had actually performed gay marriages in the past (WTG, 1st UMC!). My wedding felt more legitimate as a result.
As Rush Limbaugh embarks on his third “traditional” marriage, and all the other anti-gay activists get revealed for the hypocrites they are, I think we can easily discount their opinions as lacking merit.
Leviticus is the same chapter that tells us the right way to perform animal sacrifice, and I believe is the same one that says someone with a defect in their sight cannot approach the altar, so you’ll pardon me if I take its contents less seriously than I do the actual words of Jesus, which tended to be on the side of loving.
I applaud the “real Christians” on here who favor love over hate.
Ladies, I hope your marriage is long and fruitful, and brings you much joy.
I know it’s belated, but…
I wish you two the happiest of marriages and a long life full of happiness and love together!
You rock, love the sense of humor and enjoying yourselves. I’d recommend serving shrimp at the wedding, both because shrimp is awesome and to screw with anyone who objects.
Sooo much love for this invite
I adore the snarky wording of it. Sanctity of marriage be damned. Marriage, as defined in history, came down to what amounts as slave trade. Daughters were sold for alliances, money, property…etc. So this is what you call holy and right? Marriage, for me and many others, should be about love. Love does not discriminate. Love does not care about sexuality. Love is about a uniting of spirits and minds to create something even better. Gender should never be a concern in this. I would much rather see a drove of homosexual alliances thrive, than continue on a path of heterosexual ambition and prejudice. Really, do we need more breeding couples? In the US at least, I’d say no. We are not on the verge of extinction, humans. Not for birth rates anyway.
Come to Canada where it’s legal to destroy the sanctity of marriage.*LOL*
OR IOWA! OR NEW JERSEY! OR CALIFORNIA!
Not California since Proposition 8.
or Vermont
Yeah, not here in California it isn’t. At least not until the Supreme Court overturns Prop 8.
Embarrassing.
Or come to the Netherlands. We were the first!
When you let go of fear and mythology, you realize true love has nothing to do with sexuality.
I absolutely love this!!! It made me “awwww” & LOL all at the same time.
Don’t get get yourselves so worked up over it. It’s not affecting your marriages or your life any. I’m sorry if you don’t feel so special if Shelley and Laura can get married too. If it makes you feel any better, the state of Washington labels what they have a domestic partnership, so your cookie still has extra chocolate chips.
For those of you who are appreciative of the invitation – I do know Laura (and have met Shelley) and these women are as awesome as their invitation and the world is a much better place for their part in it.
This made me smile, congratulations to the lucky ladies!
If it is OK to unify 2 women or 2 men what is wrong to unify a woman and a dog or a man and a horse? It may be an even smaller minority but hey….who cares… if they are happy let them be!
It would be sexual deviation anyway… I don’t see the diference! Gay,lesbians,necrophilles,pedophills,zoophillis damn so many minorities and the goverment is still delaying in giving them the rights. So much unjustice…so little sanity!
If you don’t believe in Bible why do you care to destroy the sanctity? You can’t destroy something that doesn’t even exist!
Err, because primarily animals cannot consent?
Comparing gay rights to pedophillia is not only completely inaccurate, it is also amazingly offensive. That would be like stating that all men who fancy women secretly want to shag 5 year old girls.
Not all weddings take place in churches, yet a lot of governments still refuse to allow gay marriages, even in a non-religious setting. The Bible doesn’t have anything to do with it.
Not to mention the fact that all marriages, yes, here in the US, are “civil unions”. That’s why you get a license. Remember separation of church and state? EVERYONE in this country should have the same rights and privileges as well as burdens. They aren’t in your church, they aren’t in your life, and they certainly aren’t in your bedroom. Why do you care so much?
Diference?
Pedophills?
Unjustice?
Holy shit, forget the humanity!fail, I’m stuck in the grammar!fail.
Damn those Pedophills. I mean, seriously…
XD
And how old were Lot’s *married* *virgin* daughters when he shagged them?
Careful with those logical fallacies. They have a nasty habit of being turned against you.
Shelley and Laura,
Joy to the both of you on your special day and in the years to come.
Wonderful! I love this. A wedding should be a celebration of a couple promising to spend the rest of their lives together, for better or worse. I support these ladies!
People wed *each other* … and become married in the presence of their community of support. The people wedding each other may involve the sanctifying grace of their g*d(s) in the support of their wedded bliss, or not, as they so choose. If you [yes, you] believe in the sanctifying grace of your g*d(s), why ever would you believe that the way others choose to wed could possibly have any power at all over that sanctity?
Shelly and Laura, may your togetherness be blessed by each other and those around you. May the power of love in the Universe entwine with yours.
Cool, but if they’re honestly getting married in Tangerine and Orange Julius, I’ve got to get to Seattle and talk some sense into these girls…
“If it is OK to unify 2 women or 2 men what is wrong to unify a woman and a dog or a man and a horse?”
Hey, if it’s okay to unify 1 woman and 1 man, why is it wrong to unify a woman and a dog or a man and a horse? That question makes just as much sense as yours.
If “homosexuality is wrong against GOD and nature”, then why are there same sex couples in EVERY animal that mates for life? Swans, dolphins, wolves, all monkeys, polar bears, orcas, and others. How can homosexuality be against nature when it happens in nature? Animals do not have free will, so they can’t *choose* to be homosexual.
Let me respond to that with another question: How does hemophilia survive? Such a disease would be nearly guaranteed death for anyone born before we learned how to synthesize clotting agents… and yet the disease has existed for much longer than that. People with it would be highly unlikely to pass on their hemophilia-carrying genes- and heck, if a girl is born with it, she might bleed out the day she gets her first period and die right then and there, even if she lived in a bubble.
It’s a completely natural genetic disease that, up until very recently, was practically terminal- and yet the genetic nature of hemophilia meant that it could pass along the family line without affecting members, hidden away by dominant genes.
Or what about any of the other thousands of genetic diseases that would stop someone from being able to have kids, through death, through impotency, whatever. Traits can be hidden fro generations- more than long enough for evolution.
Further, homosexuality can be a plus in group animals- it’s a sort of natural population control, and provides members who will raise children without having any of their own to add to the work load. It definitely has its place.
rarely read comments, unless I smell trolls, but this is awesome! I live a few miles from seattle, and I would have loved to get an invite to this special occasion.
I’m amazed at the fact that only a few trolls have come out to play, but I’m glad that the majority of people are happy for the two of you, because I am. I really would have thought Washington State would have allowed legal marriage by now, honestly, for all the other opemninded people we have.
anyway, have a happy wedding, and a lifetime of happiness to you both.
I have never understood how so many Christians so casually use the Bible to put down the things they happen to personally not support while ignoring all the aspects of the Bible they themselves ignore in their own lives.
I have had people tell me only the new testament “counts”, that some sin is “obviously worse than others…how much love for one’s faith can there really be if the choice is to use it as a tool of hatred.
And really- how many times have we all heard how this blatant discrimination and prejudice is not at all a form of hatred?
of course not.
denying people the same rights afforded to yourself is a perfect example of love.
So, people who don’t intend on having children can’t get married either?
Wow I’m glad I think your religion is a load of messed-up crud.
I have a Catholic friend who was not permitted to marry in the Church because he was a paraplegic following a workplace accident and it was not known whether or not he could father children.
Oh mate, that is just…well I’m at a loss for words. The thought of anyone being reduced down to the sum of their reproductive organs and nothing else is just offensive at a cellular level.
The number of close-minded bigots this post brought out is staggering. Gods you lot, what makes you think someone getting married has *any* efect on you at all?
You draw the line when one of the participating individuals is incapable of providing legal consent. Why is that so hard to understand? There’s no slope at all here, let alone a slippery one. I don’t personally have any close friends who are homosexual, so I’m not personally involved in the issue at all; I just base my sense of morality on logic rather than what a religion tells me to do.
I don’t accuse all Christians of being narrow-minded, just the ones who think that the rules written down in their archaic mythological book should be the basis for governing a modern society.
EPIC WIN!!! That is the BEST wedding invite EVER…shows how clever and creative people are and I endorse their wedding wholeheartedly! I managed to override my fundamentalist Baptist upbringing, and started thinking for myself, and I am happier for it. I now await the torches and pitchforks to come calling at my door…these marriage laws should be re-written. If two people truly are in love, it shouldn’t matter if they are same-sex or opposite sex. Love is the important factor here.
Love, is love, is love. Why shouldn’t two people show their love by bonding legally? Oh, and it’s called adoption. Mothers who are against abortion give up their children to be put through a trying system. So there are plenty of children either in this country or in others, that would be more than happy to have two mothers or fathers instead of temporary foster homes. Yes, times change, the soliders were expected to find wives and give up their homosexual ways. Religion favored the union that would produce offspring and give more worshipers. When most of those religions were formed, they needed babys because most would not survive. I don’t accuse Christianity of anything,I accuse those who use a book written by man to prevent others happiness. So there.
Just because someone doesn’t believe what you believe does not make them a “close-minded bigot”. People have every right to defend traditional marriage. What is the world coming to? No one has wished these women ill, so there should be no reason for name-calling or Christan bashing. What you believe is a fictional book written by mere men we believe is a sacred text inspired by God and based on the life of our Savior. Please don’t hate.
I want to point out that the whole bible is not based on the life of Jesus… only about 1/5th of it tells the story. nothing in the Old Testament and only a bit of the New.
of course, this has nothing to do with these two women’s wedding, as marriage is a civil thing in the US. the Govt gives out the license, thus it has nothing to do with religion. this is why eventually same-sex partners will be able to marry, as the constitution is pretty firm on the states honoring each others laws in full faith and credit.
I agree! Marriage brings in religion in the vows that are said but there is no requirment to accept christianity to get married and there never will be! I believe in love and if you are christian isn’t that what you are supposed to believe in too? We changed the constitution for slaves to be free and for women to vote, it’s only a matter of time
Christians keep using the phrase “traditional marriage.” I don’t think it means what you think it means. Shall we use the American definition prior to the 1960s, which was “one man and one woman of the same race?” Or prior to the 1860s, where it was “one white man and one white woman?” or back to colonial times, when it was “One white, land-owning man and the chattel of another white, land-owning man?” Or perhaps we should look to the Bible, where polygamy runs rampant (King Solomon had hundreds of wives), a rape victim was expected to marry her attacker, and anyone marrying outside the faith was to be stoned to death?
Biblical marriage is nothing but a property contract. It used to mean that the women became the property of the man. Or that all of her property became the man’s and she didn’t own anything anymore. It also used to be a way for families to have their daughters taken care of. If divorce was allowed, only men could initiate it. Then women fought to gain more rights to goods and children and that changed. Traditionally women received the children after a divorce. That changed too.
In general, the whole “love” thing is a very new invention as far as marriage in concerned.
In short: there is no such thing as “traditional marriage”. Not even going by just so-called Christian traditions.
‘People have every right to defend traditional marriage’
Yes, in private. But too many of those people are trying to turn their own personal dislike of homosexuals into law, which isn’t acceptable. Or the people on this very post comparing a marriage between two loving women to something as perverse as pedophilia.
If you don’t like gay marriage, then don’t marry a gay person. Simple! I can’t see why that is such a problem…how does someone getting married affect YOU?
Answer? It doesn’t. Any more than my wedding messed up your life.
Of course you have every right to defend traditional marriage. The thing is, it doesn’t need defending. No one’s trying to take away your right to get married to who you want, where you want, how you want. We just want everyone else to have that right too.
Keep in mind, that, while a woman became and could not own property in the Christian, biblical sense of marriage, in what is now America, the woman owned the home and, when she wanted a “divorce”, she’d put the husband’s stuff outside the tepee or hut or long house and he would gather his things and move on. “Traditional” marriage in the US has so many meanings, you need to specify whose “tradition” you are following.
Besides, as marriage in the United States is a legal process with the option of a religious context, “tradition” need not be applied. I mean, technically, two people who own homes in different states and hardly know each other can get married to reap whatever benefits may suit them (insurance, taxes if one is unemployed, etc.), if no love is involved. Then they can live in separate homes, never to see each other, and only to do their taxes and insurance paperwork together.
Then there’s the matter of multi-traditional families. For instance, I come from a family of mixed religions. My mother is a self-defined “non-denominational Christian”, my father’s parents are Methodist (my West Virginian grandfather) and Roman Catholic (my Italian grandmother). My fiancée is Christian in that he believes in Christ, I am pagan with a slight wiccan slant, and my sister believes in the ancient Greek pantheon. Whose traditions do we follow? All of them? None of them? Our own?
If two heterosexual, loveless atheists can get married (in the legal sense) at a courthouse, why can’t two madly in love homosexuals get married in a church, temple, wat, kingdom hall, basilica, mandir, pathi, mosque, synagogue, hof, jinja, gurdwara, hof, Nhà thờ họ, Daoguan, derasar, or other place of worship that allows such unions within its walls? Or in the very same courthouse that the loveless atheists got married in?
Great comment, but you don’t seem to understand the concept of “traditional marriage”. When someone claims to be defending “traditional marriage”, they’re talking about THEIR tradition, and ONLY their tradition, for EVERYONE, EVERYWHERE, FOREVER, on pain of death and never-ending torture. They don’t care that their cult used to have different traditions, they can’t even let that thought enter their hollow heads for an instant. They don’t want the law to allow people freedom to follow other traditions. The example of atheists marrying at a courthouse cannot ever fall under their definition of “traditional marriage”, nor can any marriage involving members of any other religion, because their cult cannot stand that atheists or anyone outside their cult are even allowed to EXIST. You’ve made a very sensible, rational argument backed up by reality. But it will fall on deaf ears, because the people you’re arguing against are sociopathic xenophobic death cultists.
There are christians who are NOT insane demagogues devoid of any shred of human compassion. But they are not the ones defending this sick monstrosity they call “traditional marriage”.
I totally understand that when someone speaks of “traditional marriage” they are defending their own traditions, the “only” traditions in their mind. However, I put my thoughts out there with the hope that just one of those who defends “traditional marriage” might see my logic and think, if only for a fleeting moment.
And, many of my friends are Christians who are actually logical human beings, as well as good ones. Although many of them do not believe that same-sex marriage is “holy”, they support the legal rights afforded by marriage, and believe that they should be accessible to all consenting adults. I fear that many of those we hear about in the mainstream seem to forget that it is far more important, as a Christian, to be Christ-like (I will even admit that he was a good person) than to defend the words in the bible.
I look at it this way: What is right is not always what is Christian. And what is Christian is not always right. I mean, Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was not Christian, but Hitler was. Who was more Christ-like in action?
SHELLEY and LAURIE, CONGRATS and very best wishes . Dance your — off!
When I saw this wedding invite I immediately giggled. I’m a Canadian lesbian, proud to be marrying my partner next year. Maybe I’ll use this invite or something similar
Congrats!
So much win! I wish you the best of happiness in your life.
For the trolls: Is it not better for these women to marry each other and live in happiness, or to deny themselves, marry men and forever be in misery?
~signed,
just another dyke
j.a.d., they’re supposed to pray daily over their Bibles until their sinful lust departs from them. It worked for Larry Craig, Ted Haggard, and George Rekers, didn’t it?
–another one
Congratulations ladies!
Hi. You’re wrong. I teach Greek, and I can assure you that there is no such word as “‘homosexuality’ and other stuff” in Ancient Greek. Paul was a Hellenized Jew living under the Roman Empire. If you do not understandall three cultures, you do not understnd Paul. Paul prohibition was against what the Greek thought were sexually deviant. But, different culture, different times. We are not ancient Greeks, and I don’t think we want to liveby ancient Greek social conventions…so why should we live by their sexual mores?
ohhh now that is an awesome invite! love it. I stumbled across this and I don’t usually comment on sites but I have to let you ladies know that in ohio people are cheering u on. I could go all day debating with people about religion and marriage but I will just keep it simple. True love and hapiness makes the world a brighter place for everyone. Congrats to u both!
hahaha, there’s somewhere you can draw a line when the person’s dead??? “Well I didn’t put it in, so it don’t really count …” whahahahaha
I am totally, 100% in support of these women’s getting married legally, religiously, etc. I’m also a woman married to a woman myself. I also think their sense of humor bodes well for their marriage and agree that I’d have liked to be there.
OTOH, I agree with the person who called the invitation juvenile. This is the kind of joke that belongs in the toasts after the wedding, not on the invitation or in the ceremony. IMHO. More seriously, I hope they (like all the same-sex couples I’ve ever married or known) see themselves as doing something more important than giving someone a poke in the eye.
Even though the self-righteous, Bible-spouting, cherry-picking people on here deserve a poke in the eye if anyone does. The Bible is the world’s worst authority on marriage. It thinks rape, polygamy on a grand scale, and child exploitation are good models for marriage. Shelley and Laura look to me like they have a much better thing going than Abraham and his niece/wife Sarah (Genesis 20:12), or Solomon and his thousand “wives” (read: sex slaves) (1 Kings 11:3), or Paul and his, oh, wait, Paul was too friggin’ uptight and woman-hating to get married. You go, girls!
Shelley and Laura here again… I was just reading some of the christianists comments and we had gotten to the man / horse one and Shelley deadpanned “well, the different religions would definately be a problem.”
anyway, thanks everyone, we are so excited about the wedding; Just chose the 4 beers today and will work on the wines over the weekend.
In case you were wondering: Strongbow Cider, Baron Hefeweizen, Amstel Light, and Manny’s Pale Ale.
We really need to see pictures later on!
Mm, lovely beer choices! Congrats and WIN on the invite!
Best wishes, Shelley and Laura. Here’s to long-lasting love and life!
On Religion
“Most malevolent and persistent of all mind viruses. We should get rid of it as quick as we can.” Arthur C Clarke
I’d be willing to bet that this post has more comments than any other picture on this entire blog. Why is that? Can’t people just accept the fact that gays have as much right to a happy marriage as straights? I’d rather see gays get married than straights, or anyone for that matter, get divorced. People deserve to have happiness in their lives, regardless of the gender of the person they love and are happy with.
“Can’t people just accept the fact that gays have as much right to a happy marriage as straights?”
Sadly, no they can’t. But that’s ok; eventually all of the dinosaurs will die off and the rest of society can get on with their lives. Bonus points if it turns out I’m wrong about this god stuff and it turns out there is one. I like to imagine the conversation a god who created the universe (and therefore all the laws of science within it) might have with bigots in their afterlife. It tickles me.
[...] Best Invite Phrasing Ever Incorrect source or offensive?Tags:Wedding Announcement, ZING!, hilarious?, kinky, coincidence, [...]
Seeing that made me really happy! I wish you an awesome wedding, and a very happy life together!
Why is it always the people who are the most bigoted, hateful, discriminatory and self righteous who also feel that they are the ones bound for ‘heaven’…. lol. Do these people not own mirrors?
And for anyone who thinks that gays ‘choose’ this ‘lifestyle’ so they deserve your hatred- when exactly did you choose to be straight? Is it stuffy in your little hate filled closet?
hmmm God is ‘supposed’ to LOVE everyone, isnt there a verse that says ‘Love thy neighbor’? that would included your gay neighbors wouldn’t it??? or do they not come into it because they are not human and are demons or what ever, God created everyone Gay or Straight GET OVER IT, good on you Shelly and Laura have a long and happy life together and i hope that you adore any children you may have, (ooo there is another sin lol) Im not gay but am ‘living in Sin’ been with my partner for 8 years and are not married ‘shock horror’ and we are planing children even bigger shock horror, mwhahahahhaha guess ill see you guys in Hell.
ahahaha, that is quite hilarious. however, just to get into the religious debate, i’m quite 100% positive that homosexuality is spoken against in both the new and old testament. however (again), i personally don’t care what you do as long as you don’t care what i do. and by that i both refer to “love the sinner, hate the sin” and everyone mind their own damn business. you get nowhere by preaching angrily at people. neither do you win people over to your side by being arrogantly “superior.” i don’t care if you’re gay. just so long as you don’t expect me to like that you’re gay and/or flaunt your gayness in my face. if you can be a normal human being, that’s great, fine, good. i mean, of course i won’t agree with you. but it’s your life, not mine. love is strange, and i have no notions of being superior in any sense to anyone else.
oh but also also also this was bothering me. you can’t “destroy the sanctity of marriage” unless your referring to a specific concept of marriage. and, in this context, it would appear they are referring to the Christian concept of marriage. so it has nothing to do with “natural” or “unnatural”. if they are referring to the Christian concept of marriage then it is perfectly acceptable for other people to judge them according to that concept. and by that i mean, you can’t say “well hey you’re just saying it’s wrong cuz you’re a Christian and that doesn’t apply here. the universe is older and this is natural and blah blah blah” because they’re obviously flaunting Christian doctrine, and if you’re acting in the context of Christian doctrine then OF COURSE people are going to come back in the context of Christian doctrine. it is logic.
i’ll end with, this is still pretty hilarious. i love people who have a sense of humor, especially at weddings. what’s going to be even more funny is when one of them is actually a guy with a funny name….
I don’t agree with you. But I can certainly respect your opinion. <3
i wonder why they put that on the invitation, though.
I mean, this is the most wonderful day of their lives, why would they want the first step in publicly declaring their everlasting love to be concerned with the views of those people who resent them, and whom they apparently resent as well? awesome as it is, on your wedding-invitations? seems a little bitter. My first thought was, there’s a narrow-minded set of parents involved, whom this statement is addressed to. it would ruin the whole thing for me if the people who are supposed to love me couldn’t understand me. hope i’m wrong, and they’re just very humorous people.
Laura and Shelley here.
Actually, both our parents are very supportive, so it is really just meant to be funny… and I am not sure we are really all that Cinderella-esque “most wonderful day of our lives” about the day we get married.
Its going to fantastic, dont get me wrong. and it may end up being one of the most wonderful days of our lives. but I think we are a bit more practical and a hell of a lot more humorous about the whole thing. We do have our moments of romantic sentiment, like when we talk about the music for the first dance or when we talk about how lovely it is that our invitees are making the chuppah by decorating squares for a quilt..
but then when I make the suggestion that our first dance is to ‘baby got back” or we insist that one of our mothers will be taking a Xanax 2 hours before the ceremony or we are forcibly shoving it up her ass… we are just mostly showing that humor part.
Mostly. cause the xanax suppository has an edge of truth to it.
My girlfriend and I will be getting married that day too, so I’ll be thinking of you during our “sanctity-ruining-day!”
Keep those suppositories handy just in case.
Let’s hope your wedding day is not the most wonderful one of your lives. You have the rest of your lives together and I hope the days get better and better. Mazel tov!
For all of you Christian types who have a problem with this wonderful lesbian marriage, please reread the book of Ruth in the Bible. The whole thing is about the deep relationship between Ruth and Naomi that is condoned and affirmed by the community around them: http://www.wouldjesusdiscriminate.org/biblical_evidence/ruth_naomi.html
The words used to describe their relationship are the same the Bible uses to describe the relationship of Adam to Eve. They are the same words used in the famous “a man should leave his father and mother when he grows up and ‘cling’ to his wife.” It’s hard to miss the implication.
The famous vows spoken as marriage vows in many Christian weddings were spoken as a pledge between *two women* in the Bible:
“Do not press me to leave you or to turn back from following you! Where you go, I will go; where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die, I will die — there will I be buried. May the Lord do thus and so to me, and more as well, if even death parts me from you!” (Ruth 1:16-17)
I hope Laura and Shelley have a wonderful wedding and life together. I live in Seattle and I’m happy they can destroy the “sanctity” of marriage here. Wish I could be there to cheer them on, I’m a horribly incurable romantic
XD Why do I get the feeling MIL or FIL picked out the invitations?!
(BTW, everyone, it’s great that you have opinions, but let’s not forget, it’s just a funny picture; heaven knows if it’s even real…).
[...] courtesy of Wedinator.com, a great website to get ideas for the big day. [...]
Bravo and congrats!
At least you’re ruining the sanctity of marriage for the sake of Love and not like.. adding to the already insane divorce rate no one seems to ever comment on. Hm…
<3 Thank you. <3
I agree with you!!!
Dunno if this will get read being at the bottom and quite old buuuut I feel compelled.
I suggest anyone who has a problem with gay marriage based on their Christian Faith go read “What God Has Joined Together: The Christian Case for Gay Marriage” by David Myers and Letha Scanzoni.
It makes some very compelling arguments about how the concept of “traditional marriage” is not actually supported by Jesus, how Paul was more likely to have been speaking out against pederasty, and how the bible actually supports gay marriage instead of forbidding it.
It is a very good read, particularly if you’re not a christian and support gay marriage.
Now-a-days you don’t even need ‘religion’ to get married, just head over to the courthouse and sign the license.
And on the main note, I think these two have a great sense of humor. I wish to two of you girls many happy years together
gotta love seattle
Why does it matter that someone is gay or not!! Get a life leave these two people alone let them love each other. LOVE HAS NO BOUNDRIES!! If someone loves someone leave them be and let them be happy!! I agree with one of the last posts you do not need a religion to be married thats why we have freedom to choose!!
To all the anti gay people -
Flava of Love and I love New York.
You allowed those to happen.
That is all.
ye
Ah, two more slob carpet munchers who are too morbidly obese to find men…classic…enjoy your aids!
Aw someone’s gonna be alone the rest of their life! enjoy ur painful existence, and shut the heck up plz, ur idiocy is annoying
lol troll fail.
Haha…. WOW. You’re definitely not an idiot. Or a bigot. Nooooo.
I don’t understand why people feel the need to insist they have the right or moral obligation to thrust their beliefs on other people’s lives. And for the person who told them to “enjoy their aids”… grow up, troll. The only person I ever knew who died of AIDS was a straight, “Christian” woman who enjoyed being married a little too much (7 husbands I think?).
Shelley and Laura, enjoy your wedding. I wish you all the happiness in the world and many wonderful years together.
Sensitive much? Do you have aids too? Are you too morbidly obese to find love from the opposite gender? These two “chose” to “love” other women because they are enormous and there were 0 men that found them desireable in any way. Good thing most states still don’t recognize your fake marriage as legal. AIDS!
Wow.
I’m straight and I’m for gay marriage.
My waist line is 28 inches.
My BROTHER dated a girl who is smaller than I am and came out a month later.
They’re good friends and she has a girlfriend now.
who is a model.
And they’re both virgins still.
No AIDs.
Any questions?
Love this invite… You attack this sanctity of Marriage while I work as a Science teacher here in Kentucky trying to convince students that the world is more that 4000 years old and there is such thing as evolution.
Yeah, because Kentucky is such a backwater place that we can’t wrap our minds around the concept of evolution. Way to be just as prejudicial.
Well, Stuz is in the classroom with the students. Do you think he/she is just inventing the ones who don’t accept evolution? Or maybe he/she actually does encounter students who need convincing on this point, and ought to be thanked by other Kentuckians for doing the good work?
I love this… The cherry on the sundae is that it’s in Seattle!
AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDS!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh, I’m sorry that you got AIDS and you need to let us know, wang chi thi… I hope that there is some medicine that you can take to get better…
wow…what an awesome comeback…did you go to comedy school to learn comebacks like that, or are you just that talented? GTFOH!
Well, at least I approached it with humor instead of just being an insulting TROLL. May you receive out of life what you put into it. ^_^
Win.
omg i luuuuv this! I’m not gay, but very supportive, and plz leave religion out of this guys/chicks? Love is Love, thats that. -high five 2 the new couple-
It’s impossible to leave religion out of this discussion, because there is no reason in the real world to deny two women who love each other the right to marry. The only way to sustain the anti-gay hate-fest is to claim an invisible tyrant in the sky demands for these people to be treated as less than human, denied equal protection under the law, and tortured without end after death. Without religion there would be no controversy over same-sex marriage.
I’m Christian too, I have no problem with gay marriage. And even if I did, what right do I have to tell anyone how to live? What right do I have over anyone’s life? That’s the problem I have with the gay-marriage issue; people think they can tell others what is right and what is wrong. Well here you go; what you believe is right is only right for you, not every single person on earth. So, stop pushing your opinions on others and mind your own buisness.
-hugs you- Why can’t there be more Christians like you?
I fully and whole-heartedly agree with this statement.
The easiest sins to condemn are those that do not tempt you.
Kudos to the couple. Cute invites.
yis
relax people….
[...] Women’s Studies course taken 10+ years ago, this invite is pretty cool! I mean it’s no lesbian laugh riot or King Kong vs. Godzilla Smackdown, but it’s still a good idea. I’m just not entirely [...]
-.- I think some people might be over reacting. And for all we know, Shelley might be a man’s name. I think it’s awesome how all of you assumed that these are lesbians.
I’ve never heard of a guy named Shelley but I’ve had three women introduce themselves as Shelley.
First, Congrats, neighbors!
Second, who gives a fat rat’s patoot what plumbing you have…. have a wonderful life and best of luck with all that…
Third… FRESH CAN OF WORMS, PEOPLE… What about those of us who are straight, in a committed relationship but…. POLY-AMOROUS! (da-da-DAAAAAAAA!!!)
Let the flames begin…
First: CONGRATS! YOU GIRLS ARE AWESOME! Second: I was reading the comments and decided to pop in and say that the k1tt3h is making me laugh REALLY hard.. I’m Christian..but I’m totally for gay rights..and if that makes her/him think I’m not christian..the I should let you know..I’ve considered converting cause Christianity has somne pretty screwed up laws. Just had to put my two cents in!
Keira, come on over to the Unitarians… what Christianity was *before* the big shake-up of 300 AD. Read the Gospel of Thomas, and of Marian, and the other gospels that were removed from the cannon.
doesnt GOD love every1? everysingle person in this world was put there by God for a purpose. God forgives and personally i think its worse that pastors and preists r doing inapporiate things with kids (little boys!!!) .. before any of u start preaching about this kind of stuff please think about wats going on rite under ur noses!
So, katie, you’re saying christians should deal with the beams in their own eyes before they whine about the motes in their neighbors’? Or maybe let he who is without sin cast the first stone?
There’s no way any True Christian would ever endorse such evil godless humanist propaganda as that. Why, next you’ll be telling them to love their neighbors or treat others as they’d like to be treated!
So glad I’m a Christian Scientist after reading this (it’s unrelated to Scientology). So glad that my church does not condemn gays (though, admittedly, it doesn’t approve of them either).
I hope you guys have a wonderful wedding and that you have a life of love. <3
I'm straight, in a relationship with a man who is NOT of my race, and I approve this message. *stamp*
No, no, equating homosexuality to the rape of children and animals doesn’t necessarily mean a person is ignorant. They could be deliberately lying. Or they could be insane. Or they could be ignorant, insane liars.
spoiler alert >>
If god existed he/she/it would take proper “judgement” rather than watch all of us fighting in our little “ant farm” that we must be comparitavely. Now, I know that people like to believe in a heaven; it reassures us that we will still exist in some form after our time on Earth ends. However, truth of the matter is that you won’t know for sure until you die, and by then, it’s too late to come back and tell your friends “OMG, I went to heaven”. People like K1tt3h really need to stop pushing such radical Christianity unto the mentally able masses :/
Epic win for Shelley and Laura!
“I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ.” — Mahatma Gandhi
Yeah, Christ did an amazing job getting along with everyone and never offending anyone with his views on God … well, actually, his views on Himself, since he said he WAS God.
Unless of course you consider that little tiff with the members of his own faith who hated him so much for equaling himself with God that they crucified him for it.
And then there was that part where he says, “I am the way, the truth and the life, NO ONE comes to the Father (or goes to Heaven) but by ME.” Ref: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+14:6&version=NIV
But let a Christian stand up for the same declaration as made by Christ HIS OWN SELF, and they are called horrible narrow minded fundamentalist bigots.
Christians certainly aren’t perfect, but despite Gandhi’s trite marginalization of them, by and large, they are only saying more or less what they’ve heard their Savior say. And, as promised would happen by Christ, they are hated for it.
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+15:18&version=NIV
I missed that part in the Bible that says free healthcare for all.
However, there were some commands to THE INDIVIDUAL (NOT THE GOVERNMENT) to do some of the things you quoted. And you don’t have the slightest idea what I AS AN INDIVIDUAL do in those cases. But you would rather pass judgment on me as if you do.
And if ANYBODY is forcing “dogma” it’s the current administration forcing it’s secular free healthcare dogma on a public that’s getting ready to vote their sorry hinnies outta office in about 2 months.
So enjoy your secular savior, the Big O, for as long as you have him. The independent voters have “finally” wised up to what we’ve being warning about all along.
But since you aren’t replying for the sake of debate, but rather to hate on me and those who think like me, I’m not going to reply further.
So hate some more at me if it makes you feel better… but I won’t be checking the “notify me” box after sending this. So all your hate will fall on deaf ears.
Dave, I’m not the one who mentioned Obama. You did. Your cult has developed such a pile of idiotic delusions about him. Obama is not a savior, he’s a POLITICIAN. He’s not as incompetent as the drunken frat boy with voices in his head that you worshiped while he sent thousands of American soldiers to die claiming your imaginary god told him to. Compared to the senile sell-out and his brainless bible bimbo he was the best choice for the future of the country, which really says something sad about what’s been happening to this nation. We’ve replaced an incompetent and shamelessly criminal adminstration with a spineless one that’s continuing much of the same idiocy.
The bottom line is, your god is imaginary, and your cult is too weak and cowardly to even attempt to support their claims on the merits. You don’t have anything that even vaguely looks like a good reason to treat gay people as second-class citizens. Trying to change the subject to the President won’t change that. It won’t be long before your cult loses this battle against human rights and equality, just like you lost on slavery and womens’ rights. Who will be the next target when your cult needs a scapegoat to con the gullible into giving up their money?
I’ve read my share of fiction. No reason to pick that bible up again.
Way to be supportive of these fat slobs everyone…it’s truely beautiful with two enormous women who are incapable of finding the genitalia that is now burried in fat rolls. No men would dare come near you disgusting pigs, so why not do your best not to crush each other while you attempt to f***.
@wang chi thi: Human being FAIL (You, not them)
As a Christian, my best wishes to the happy couple. Your way isn’t right for me, but I wish you much joy and happiness. What you do is between you and God and none of my business. Wishing you a lovely commitment ceremony.
[...] Related: Best Invite Phrasing Ever [...]
I do believe that this comment section is better than Treasure Island, The book I’m being forced to read and amavoiding reading at the moment.
I think all the people like k1tt3h need to go read this article that puts everything I’d love to say in perfect words: http://www.soulforce.org/article/homosexuality-bible-gay-christian
…Wow, this is just sad. About 10% of this comment section actualyl says something about the post. Then about 10% is commenting about atheism, or telling people to get a sense f humor. The last 80% is Bible quote wars.
Jumping on the bandwagon, something that has occurred to me:
In 12th grade I sat next to a girl I’ve know sense 5th grade. We were discussing evolution in class, and she kept freaking out bout how ‘God created the world in 7 days! Evolution is fake!’ and all that. My response: “God is an ethereal entity, and he lives forever, yes? (She replied yes.) Well then, 7 days to HIM may be billions of years to US. So day one: billions of years for solar systems to form.
Day two: Earth gains atmosphere and forms land.
Day three: Plants evolve, maybe insects start to be living. Dinosaurs probably lived now.
Day four: Entire universe finally falls into proper orbitation and balance.
Day five: (Birds and fish) The birds and fish survive while dinosaurs fall extinct.
Day six: Animals and humans evolve to the point of people not being monkeys anymore.
Day seven: We are living it now. God is resting and watching the tragedy/action/romance that is the life everyone lives now.”
Her reply: “….Jesus died for your sins!”
Epic fail. I give her logic that MIGHT work with evolutionists and Christians and she just spews jargon.
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